Using MY AFFECTS to help me access and infer these beliefs – learning from my patients!

Weiss (and many others) has taught that we can use our feelings as a signal to teach us the dangers a patient is trying to ward off. These are my best indicators of what my parents are unconsciously experiencing.

For ex:  If I am feeling especially unusually skillful, my patient may be trying to taking care of me as they had to bolster a fragile parent; they may suffer from omnipotent worry, If they are acting unusually casual and friendly, in a provocative manner, not getting down to work, they may be testing my capacity to allow them to enjoy life. If I am experiencing unpleasant hostile intense feelings this is often a “passive into active” repetition of their childhood trauma. Time and money complaints like “it’s too much trouble” could be rejection tests. When they are presenting themselves as if they are too much trouble, they can’t be helped, or they are a big burden, they may suffer from a trauma of having had a worried overwhelmed parent who they were unable to help. If they are opaque, they may have a shameful hidden secret they’re not ready to reveal.

Our reactions to our patients and their reactions to us will help orient us!

[If you pass these tests] You should see an increase in confidence, which should result in an increase in the patient’s relief, insight and boldness. You should see a decrease in depression and anxiety or consider that you are on the wrong track. Tease out the plan from all your material. Utilize all the material you have gathered from discerning and passing these tests to formulate or refine a hypothesis about the patient’s plan for getting better.